Learning to Thrive with Bipolar Disorder
Many of us want things to be just right, but when it crosses over to needing to be perfect all the time, it becomes an impossible ideal that can never be reached. That becomes very frustrating and exhausting. What is “perfect” anyway, is it what you believe or what someone else believes? This becomes even more exhausting if you are trying to keep up with what is perfect for someone else like your mother-in-law or maybe even your own mother. If someone else is driving you to be perfect, you need to stop letting them rule your life.
Once you have got all the other “voices” to stop pushing you to perfection, you then just need to work on yourself. Sometimes “Good Enough” is good enough. So what if you have a few spots on your dishes after they’ve been run through the dishwasher? Unless you’re having a major event or party going on, let it go, it’s good enough. So what if your house isn’t spotless and completely cleaned top to bottom? When you are in a depressed state, it’s hard to get out of bed sometimes, much less clean everything. So quit kicking yourself when you’re down. Your house doesn’t have to be perfect all the time.
What other areas in your life are striving to be “perfect”? Finances, relationships, health, education, and your job are all areas that are important , but you don’t have to strive for perfection. Perfection is only an ideal that someone has arbitrarily set for themselves. What is good enough to be satisfactory may vary from person to person, but it should not drive you to a point of hopelessness because it’s not just right. It is okay to lower your standards. You may not get the highest grade in the class, but a “B” is still a worthy grade. So what if you are not the top athlete at the gym; if you are working on your goals, then it’s good enough. If you have goals that you are working on, whether it’s just to get out of bed today and take a shower because you are depressed, or to lose 25 lbs this year, then you are already ahead of many people that aren’t moving forward in their life. And those of us who have bipolar disorder, may have to shift our goals day-by-day when we are either depressed or manic. Depression slows everything down so go easy on yourself if you are in that state. On the other hand, being manic usually has us going in 100 different directions with no real progress on any one goal. Then we get depressed again and feel overwhelmed because we have 100 different unfinished projects. Sometimes, you have to let 90% of those go and focus on the ones that really matter. But remember that you only have to work on good enough. It will make you feel better in the end to get 10 things done at good enough rather than 1 thing done at near perfection.
I hope you gained some useful insights, and for more information visit me at www.thrivingwithbipolardisorder.com
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I wish you the best in all your pursuits.
Author: Cassandra L. Good, MA